Driving Sales With Humor

Posted: by Speider Schneider in Labels: , , , ,

One of my favorite writing projects is humorous openings for sales pitches. These were for a car dealership. With all the exciting content of oil changes and tire pressure, a bit of humor sets the readers up for content that is less than instructional and informative... it's just not miles of laughs.


Perry Hotter And The Reclusive Raventoe

Posted: by Speider Schneider in Labels:

The draft for book eight in the magical series...
Chapter three
No one noticed him. He sat in the back row of classes. He sat, as he did now, at an empty table in the dining hall, his back to all others, picking at his toad gruel with raven infused sausages, contemplating how much he hated pumpkin juice and craved a cold mudgle, chocolate Yoo-Hoo.

What perhaps helped him stay out of the sight and minds of others was merely being part of the Raventoe house. No Raventoe had ever made anything out of themselves. They were the C-D+ students at Hogguts. Head Wizard's Room attendant was about as high a position any Raventoe could dream of. They were the "short boat" kids of the school. His uncle at least had his own wizard rock band but with songs limited to such hits as "Troll, troll, troll, ya gotta rock and roll, roll, roll," "Sometimes I know why the hypogriff cries," "He's a wanker little elf who plays with himself" and the always snappy, "He who can not be named, all the hot witches want your love to be tamed," he could never hope to break the magical barrier and play in the mudgle world. Between his job of loading luggage at the wizarding airport and playing for tips at the Leaky Cauldron every second Saturday, the huge and successful gig at the Malfoy barmitzvah and the Tri-Wizard Ball, he managed to squeak by and still pay for Dish TV so he wouldn't go insane with the boring shows on Wizard Cable.


Biking, Blogging and Bacon

Posted: by Speider Schneider in Labels: , , , , , , , ,

A new social media client is a small but innovative bicycle company in my home town of Brooklyn, New York. Brooklyn Cruiser has a line of bikes based on Urban Bikes, also known as City Bikes or the European name, the Dutch Bike. It's some fun subjects I get to write about but, most recently, I got the chance to work Kevin Bacon into a post!

Here's a few more posts of mine. If you like biking, then they are a "must read." If you like humor and bike riding, then... they are really a "must read!"

Brooklyn Cruiser officially launches in late July and blog posts will increase but here's the first few, just to "peddle" the blog to you!



Business is buzzing about this “new” social media. It’s sweeping the world and every firm has to have it but few understand where it came from and how it actually works. There’s infighting in large corporations for which department will own the social media outreach and people are hanging placards on their profiles that tout themselves as “social media experts," but their tweets are more like twits and the practice has yet to be defined in terms of how it’s effective and how it can be gauged as successful. The answer is to ask the creatives who have been doing it for many years.

Published 6.24.2011 - Read more at Onextrapixel